Backward rolls and sexy cats in Valencia....

Every now and then the stars align and send you somewhere they know you need to be. I'm awkward, I've never really fitted anyway 100%, I was a child that preferred her own company, I was never cool, a rotund, quiet and uncool presence, fitting in just wasn't on the agenda. I became a performer with a morbid fear of performing having been told at college that perhaps I should consider the plumbing course instead of the dance one. I soon discovered I enjoyed the process of movement, I loved rehearsing, exploring, playing, I loved double work and even being dropped from heights. I loved flying through space. I was strong but never flexible, on reflection dancing was never going to be an easy path but I just loved the emotional freedom movement gave me. I'm grateful for those years, in spite of the heartache and the legacy of poor body image, I met my two closest friends. That in itself ,makes it all worthwhile, not to mention meeting my husband  too!

Time out with my husband in Valencia after a day of Pilates!

And then two years ago on a trip to NYC, on advice from a fellow Pilates teacher I went to re:AB Pilates http://www.reabnyc.com/ I had a 1-1 session with +BrookeSiler , on  previous trips I had not had the courage to take class in NYC fearing I wasn't good enough and would just embarrass myself (even after 10 years of teaching Pilates), I had always felt lacking because of my lack of Studio apprenticeship training. I needn't have worried as the generous, fun and vivacious energy that Brooke gave me was all about discovering what I could do and leaving the negativity of ingrained over analysis and judgement at the door. I discovered that perhaps Teaser was possible in my body, I just had to change tactics and perspective. I left knowing my teaching would never be the same again but more importantly with a passion for Pilates re awakened in a way that blind sided me. I will be forever grateful for this brief encounter.

Two years on and randomly through Facebook I heard about the Classical Pilates Conference in Valencia http://www.valenciaclassicalpilates.com/  Now as I mentioned before I'm awkward in groups, nervous around people I don't know but Brooke was one of the presenters and this was too good an opportunity to miss, and so with my husband coming along as company (to keep me in Caipirinha's etc) I went to my first Pilates conference. And so it was I met the other presenters +KathiRoss-Nash and +PeterFiasca , along side Brooke these three teachers took us all through three days of Classical Pilates.
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Peter's energy is calm, clear and technical conveying a deep love and knowledge of Joseph Pilates legacy but nothing could have prepared me for the energetic, unstoppable whirlwind that is Kathi, she alone is a reason to take up drinking Vodka, regularly! (on the assumption that my Pilates would of course be improved) Session One had us being sexy cats and slutty cats and rolling down picking up imaginary martini's, that's it - Finally I found somewhere I fitted in as a teacher (if you have read the previous blog on dancing stegosauruses you will appreciate this epiphany) .We sweated, laughed, collided and grown men definitely cried through the Mat classes taught at the beginning and end of days, everyone left full of energy, vibrant and full of life, and surely that's the point, as Pilates teachers/students shouldn't we always leave workshops, seminars and lectures full of answers and even more questions that we can then use  to inspire our own clients? Instead of finding reasons to restrict, analyse and reign them in more, filling them with fear of their bodies and moving we should be freeing them up, after all, just because 1 in 3 of us likely to experience cancer in our lifetime doesn't mean we should treat everyone with the thought that they might already have it, surely?!

I left the conference with renewed energy, not withstanding various new aches and some new friends but also  a burning need to learn more and more and with the notion that perhaps one day I would actually be able to do a cartwheel, if not before my 40th birthday next month then at least in my 40th year...So as I approach my birthday I cant wait to start a studio apprenticeship in September, although equipment qualified I have never felt my training gave me the full understanding that an apprenticeship would allow me, much like learning choreograhy from Labanotation or video never compared to rehearsing in a studio. Up until now I never wanted to teach on equipment as I never felt it was fully in my bones and muscles, and so finally I'm taking the time to explore, play and inevitably fall of the Wunda chair, and because just maybe instead of being the shy insecure cat (my classes are never going to believe this description!) I might finally become a sexy one and maybe even become a better Pilates teacher in the process.

With sincere thanks to Brooke Siler, Kathi Ross-Nash, Peter Fiasca and Tony Balongo for an amazing event, roll on 2014!

Keep Cart wheeling everyone...

Suzy x

If you knew the plane was going to crash would you still get on it?....
Ok so I admit it, I'm being a little provocative here, the answer is of course No. The original question a friend actually asked me was, 'If you knew a plane had a 90% chance of crashing would you still get on it?'. Now things start to become a little more interesting after all you now have a 10% chance of arriving safely. Not liking my odds (or flying that much) I had to admit I would not get on, even if the Prosecco and peanuts were included as part of the in-flight service and Bradley Cooper was the Pilot!.

The whole discussion came about over the recent debate surrounding breast cancer and preemptive surgery http://www.cancerresearchuk.org/cancer-help/type/breast-cancer/about/risks/breast-cancer-genes Angelina Jolie brought news of her recent elected double mastectomy to the world table and with it an outpouring of both praise and criticism. I have read comments claiming that these procedures are nothing more than anti feminist actions aimed at disempowering women, I personally have never perceived my breasts as holding any particular super powers? I  have heard the very issue of genetics questioned with the same conspiracy fever that Area 51 followers exhibit. But in the end (Yes I'm proud to say I am actually a feminist who does shave their legs and wear high heels if anyone actually cares) it comes down to women and men having the right to know if they are at a higher risk of developing breast or Ovarian Cancer. I understand Melissa Etheridges very public statement (she is a breast cancer survivor herself) but to label preemptive surgery as 'a fearful choice'  is at best misguided and at worst dangerous. Ms jolie, and many like her will have taken time and consideration regarding such drastic surgery eventually deciding it was a 'proactive' alternative in trying to  ensure a greater chance of extending life. http://www.nytimes.com/2013/05/14/opinion/my-medical-choice.html?_r=0 I've lost many friends and clients to Cancer, each journey different, all painful.

In the end only the person can decide whats right for them, but everyone deserves the choice, sadly thats not yet currently the case, Perhaps then the world of celebrity can bring the weight of this issue to the public arena, if needs be in high heels and sequins but whichever way, lets not close the lid on the box now the discussion is out there. And so it is with Teaching, I'm always trying to guide people through possibilities so that in the end the client can decide what the right choices are in their lives. In this last month my beloved Elder cat died, I was hospitalized and underwent surgery, I ran a Pilates Holiday in Cyprus (2 weeks post Op) and lost a friend to Throat Cancer, he had been told in 1981 he would be dead of AIDS in 6 months, he didn't like his odds so he got the next plane out, it just happened to be 22 years later. Rene was inspiring, vibrant and grabbed hold of Life with the most amazing tenacity. We met as Volunteers for the Foodchain www.foodchain.org.uk around 1994, he taught me things about the Gay club scene that I never knew I needed to know, or will ever forget!, he thought me wearing high heels in the kitchen was fabulous and he taught me lunch without wine was simply not lunch.

In truth its been a tough month but perhaps thats the point, life keeps going. Mr Tomas (the cat) quietly crossed the bridge whilst I wasn't looking or worrying, René's heart did exactly the same thing sparing himself and those he loved the indignity of a tortured end. The wonderful people I met in Cyprus brought such positive energy to the Holiday how could I not feel a greater passion and for what I do? My classes and clients have been incredibly supportive watching me literally re-piece my body back together post surgery...Friends have driven me crazy, just enough to keep me sane. So I for one will be happy to wait for the next Plane out, fearful or not,  proactive or not, its all just a game of Odds, the most important thing it would seem is how you choose to play the game....

2 Weeks post Op, a lifetimes work in progress!

Keep up the practice and Love,

Suzy

www.seraphinapilates.com

Eyore's headstand and an appendix in withdrawal...

Moonwalk 2013

In all honesty I had thought my next post would be about the London Moonwalk 2013. Taking part last weekend with 17,000 women and men was as expected an inspiring event to be part of and besides which Mum and I raised over £900 for charities supporting those affected by breast cancer, both my grandmothers have had mastectomies and one still lives with the disease, I have heard countless arguments suggesting that Breast cancer gets a disproportionate amount of funding and attention, I have heard arguments against the pink ribbon and its prettifying of a brutal, cruel disease. I've heard women prepared to have their scars photographed vilified and criticised. My answer to all this to participate in a walk and support however I can because until those who criticise walk in someone else's shoes quite honestly their judgement falls on deaf ears.

After the walk I was unusually shattered, I'm pretty resilient but I couldn't shake off a feeling of unwellness, Monday and Tuesday were both normal days, I took part in advanced studio classes but after teaching Tuesday evening I knew something was wrong...so off I trotted to St Charles Urgent care doctor, who kindly reassured me but sent me on St Mary's Hospital, Paddington. The odd thing about this whole process was it never really occurred I would be admitted (I drove after all), I suspected my appendix was unhappy but assumed anti biotics would be given, 4am Wednesday morning I was sat on a ward desperately trying to borrow a blackberry charger (nurse Sally I am indebted to you) and so the most surreal 24 hours unfolded, animals at home alone, a car needing to be moved before 8.30am, thankfully taken care of by mum and dad in the middle of the night and early hours. I was told that in spite of my apparent health and excellent blood results (that always confuses surgeons as vegans are meant to always be ill and deficient) within 48 hours I would be significantly less well. After X-rays, an ultra scan and endless prodding, bloods, cannula's (I hate blood being taken) and more importantly no tea I was added to the list for Surgery.

Now Tea is pivotal here as I'm hyper sensitive to it and although I don't drink that much If I don't have it, after 8 hours I hit serious withdrawal, by the time my lovely friend Amanda arrived at 7pm wed evening I still hadn't gone in for surgery and I had a banging migraine, was sweating and vomiting. The appendix discomfort was nothing compared to hitting an impromptu rehab scenario, Tetley's you have a lot to answer for! I even remember asking the anaesthetist for a caffeine drip instead of Tramadol, he sympathised, laughed and sent me into a scene of Pooh bear and Eyore doing a hand stand, I remember drifting and wondering if I'd ever do corkscrew again.....

I hate needles!

I woke up convinced I was in a Stephen King novel, and it appeared that the Tramadol I had turned down was for the diaphragm spasms that no one had warned me about, lasting on and off for 24 hours!....come back appendix all is forgiven, I have never breathed that deeply or laterally, EVER! at that point I realise my abdominals appear to have been removed during surgery....that was not expected, I'm pulling in and literally nothing is happening. Keep calm and keep focused my calm voice tells me, F***, F***, F***! my other voice is screaming. The warm glass of water someone offered me in recovery was the greatest thing I have ever drunk as was my first cup of tea!. 8 hours later I have been sent home. In the meantime my husband flew back from Portugal to help out (a great sign of friendship given our current situation), as everyone who knows me will appreciate I do not like accepting help, I'm strong, independent and stubborn however, there is something very humbling about not being able to walk up and down a flight of stairs, lift a kettle or get up from lying down (I told you they had removed my abs, roll ups are but a dream)

So really this blog is a thank you to the amazing staff at St Marys, most of whom my path crossed for only a few moments but whom work tirelessly within the NHS to ensure people whose lives are suddenly upturned feel safe, protected and listened to. This institution should be outside of Politics, its something that Britons should be extremely proud of and protect at all costs. I saw people working with reduced resources, working past their shifts and showing dedication far beyond their duty. To those who took time out to send well wishes they meant more than you realise, to those friends who asked for updates at any hour you cannot imagine how this helped keep my nerves down and raised a smile or two in the darkness, to Amanda, Georgina and of course the charming +BenCullinger who continues to answer my ongoing questions with quiet humour and will shortly I'm sure make the most wonderful doctor, I am convinced, thank you.

As for me 3 days on I'm moving more each day, back to teaching with just my voice from tomorrow...I've loved the messages assuming I'm going to be easier in class just because my own abs are on sabbatical...like that's going to happen, reread the stubborn paragraph above....I'm back on full strength tea so now so anything really is possible....

Much love all,
Suzy x

Warning...this blog may make you sweat!

So I've just come back from running my first Pilates Retreat of the year in Italy. The group was a fab mix of people who have known me for years and friends and family of aforementioned participants. so this is where it always gets interesting for me when I meet new people, people invariably start with the line ' I've heard all about you, I've heard your tough...scary...relentless....picky' but by far  the best comment I have heard this year whilst discussing someone's previous Pilates experience was 'I dont like strength work, its too hard' so now I'm intrigued, how exactly had this person been able to get away with regular Pilates sessions without doing any strength work?!

A medieval stair master!

I appreciate the sentiment, in truth I would like to spend endless hours doing long, deep stretches, its what my part feline DNA craves but in truth that would get me nowhere, as my teacher brain reminds myself regularly. So why are some teachers still providing clients with what they want and not what they need? Sadly I see this time and time again, particularly where clients are older, teachers look at the age of the client and not the body and health of the client. Is there some magic line we cross from 49 into 50, 59 into 60 or 69 into 70? If there is I've yet to identify it and as such I teach to make people stronger- regardless of age. In all honesty  I'm not there to let them just exercise their jaws (though of course we do that too!)

As a consequence the client who didn't like strength work but who rose to the challenge and pushed herself to try did fantastically well over the 3 days, and yes, she sweated and yes her muscles ached the following day but as I reminded her the last time she had been aware of them was probably 40 years earlier giving birth! I often have people say to me 'just so your aware, I'm sweating' like its something they should be suspicious of or concerned about. I reassure them its just a sign of hard work and effort, I do concede that  I do have to be prompted to put the air conditioning on as my Gecko blood does not register heat and classes can become very 'Bikram' without me realizing it, but my guys know this and usually prompt me straight after Criss cross!

So we had a great time working hard, walking up endless steps, drinking Prosecco (to recover from the steps) and in my case riding horses daily, and yes I did ache and my ability to do a roll end seemed to evacuate my body with the speed of an Arab Stallion on too many oats, but thats the point of the Retreat, which is actually a Holiday pretending to be meaningful. We all put ourselves out of our comfort zones and all came back stronger, healthier and in the case of one of my girls able to fit back into her favorite skirt despite eating breakfast everyday. Perhaps the sweating was useful after all?!....but just to be sure I'm heading to Cyprus next month to teach my next Pilates Holiday, after all, better to be sure.

Mid back, inner thighs and definitely sit bones, oh and a very happy Me!

Have a great weekend all....

Suzy x

www.seraphinapilates.com

https://www.facebook.com/seraphina.pilates.retreats

Resuscitating Pilates....

So last weekend I finally got round to updating my First Aid certificate and in truth had my Insurance not been dependent on it I would probably still be trying to find the right time to fit it in. Sadly we live in a society which doesn't promote it in schools, colleges or University and for many as adults unless they have been required to, First Aid is something you hope someone else with apply should the need ever arise.

Lipstick ready!

Fortunately courtesy of the lovely +TishaHarrington who runs the gorgeous Pilates and Gyrotonic studio at www.kingscrossstudios.co.uk I got myself enrolled, even the dog was there to say good morning. I have done several course's over the years, some more intensive than others but most presented with humor and humility, recognizing not everyone will be able to actually do CPR but everyone should at least know how, on these courses the biggest thing we are reminded of is the value of reassurance and compassion to another human being. Its always personal when I do these courses, I have had to do first aid at 2 motor cycle accidents, I directed traffic at one and ended up covered in blood at another, I dont believe he survived but I hope my clumsy words meant he didn't feel alone or frightened. I dealt with a hit and run where a woman's leg was broken, the hardest thing here was getting someone to hold onto my dog's lead! I've dealt with couriers passing  out, whilst cycling- next time perhaps he will not party quite so hard and leave without breakfast, and this week as is always the case after I update my certificate I discovered someone laid out after a fall- so now you know why I'm always apprehensive after a course.

The issue here is it doesn't matter if your good at these situations, I generally revert to a distressed toddler at the thought of having a holiday vaccination, it just matters that you try. less than one in ten people who stop breathing outside of hospital will receive CPR, people are literally dying because people dont know what to do. Of course there are times when it will make a difference only to those left behind, my mother will be forever grateful for the men who tried to resuscitate my father who died at 45. She herself was a first aider and worked in a hospital but sometimes we are just too close. Perhaps this is why I left the biggest lipstick mark on Rescue Annie  and compressed with unstoppable ardor last weekend, the lipstick mark would have made my dad smile for sure, if only for the course leaders expression at the glossy red display. Apparently I give excellent mouth to mouth! Well sometimes even dark humor can lighten the mood!

So if you don't know what to do if someone stops breathing, if you dont know to do compressions even if you cant do mouth to mouth. If you don't know what to do in the silence as someone chokes then sign up for a course sooner rather than later. We work tirelessly to keep our clients fit and healthy but what happens if one day they really do need to breathe, would you feel confident knowing what to do?, would you be ok with doing nothing?. In this area I really am an expert, doing something may just save a life or bring a little piece of mind to those you have to see after the drama long subsides....though to be fair I'm going to skip the 'How to deliver a baby' section....someone put the kettle on and get some towels.

Keep well, Keep healthy and Pilates on....

Suzy x

www.seraphinapilates.com

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Stegosaurus Show girls....and this is why I'm unemployable!

Expect rain and you get 28 degrees in Rome!

I was fortunate enough to attend a workshop with +AlyceaUngaro earlier this year and part of the day was dedicated to language and how we use it as teachers, now once I'd got past the inevitable embarrassment of not being able to determine between adjectives, nouns and verbs, what can I say I get confused...It really made me think. We know as teachers that its not just our words that hold information but the way we demonstrate the exercises, the way we cue with our hands in contact and yes, I admit it, I do hold peoples pony tails up (please don't tell the PC police). But ultimately its our words that find our way into peoples subconsciousness. I'm genuinely pleased when people tell me they could hear my voice whilst they were brushing their teeth reminding them to stand taller, having established their not having a multiple personality episode first of course.

And so it came to be recently that late on a thursday evening my intermediate group found themselves being Show girl Stegosauruses'. You see such was my train of thought simply being a dinosaur wasn't enough, they had to be beautiful, show girl dinosaurs. By now you either have your head in your hands or are smiling, I very much hope its the latter so bear with me....I have no idea where this came from or indeed why it worked, I never never seen my group be so mindful of how their backs were working but in choosing an image so obscure both their imagination and neural paths and mine were both fired up. Their was no familiarity or complacency with this image because they didn't anticipate it, and I realized that perhaps when we suspend our habits, intellectually, physically, emotionally we can start to see our bodies as being capable of so much more than our self imposed barriers and habits allow?

More importantly however, they laughed, I laughed at myself and we all moved with more power and grace (well after all performing dinosaurs are both aren't they) I did however recollect the time a very good friend, client and mentor one day uttered the statement  'Suzy I think your wonderful, but you are utterly unemployable', I simply cannot follow one view on things,  at that moment as I packed the kit up and left the studio I suddenly and finally understood what she meant, and its the very thing and clients and classes respond to. From one week to the next they don't know if they are getting insights from workshop's I've attended or readings straight from 'Return to Life' but they do know that I will challenge them to think outside their own expectations, after all a man who wanted us to be seals couldn't really have a problem with us being dinosaurs occasionally could he? I do hope not because the class really did breathe and move beautifully....

Have a great weekend all and remember heads high and swish those tails....

Suzy x

www.seraphinapilates.com

Join me in Italy and Cyprus for my Pilates Retreats http://www.seraphinapilates.com/pilatesbreaks.html

I also write for www.fightingfifty.co.uk ,occasionally play on FB and appear as @suzyseraphina on Twitter

I'm well aware my derriere is soggy....connection, what connection?!

So there it is, I admit it, my gluts do not 'fire', most of the time, I know its radical but as a Pilates teacher who talks daily ad nauseam about connections between inner thighs, gluts, deep abdominals etc, the reality is, mine appear to be an enigma to myself and to most of teachers who teach me....Today the poor cover teacher who taught me experienced the dilemma so many before her had attempted to unravel...

I'm always open to being taught by new teachers as I truly believe everyone has something to bring to the table of teaching, established teachers have the benefit of experience and confidence, new teachers often have enthusiasm and fresh eyes, and with each one I hope the answer to the Holy Grail of my unresponsive backside will be answered....sadly today was not the day and one more teacher was left bewildered and confused....

I honestly tried to reassure her it was not her fault, her enthusiastic yet inevitable cue's of  'draw in, draw up', 'heels together', 'connect the hamstrings', and 'lengthen more' did not magically make them awaken. I concede Footwork on the reformer finds a hint of them and Knee Stretches definitely does not, quad burn anyone?! but before you shout 'but your obviously not doing it right' at this post please appreciate I have been observed by the best and still they smile, wrinkle their brow and say 'but it should work?' My point is the teacher covering was charming and absolutely knew her stuff but sometimes the script has to be changed, sometimes as teachers we have to change our cues, expectations and assumptions or simply allow an exercise not to work (life does not end because I cant make Up-stretch happen)

Thankfully not one to give up my regular teacher  takes on the challenge that is my bodies biomechanic uniqueness, with creativity and humor along with  the Wunda chair, high chair and spine corrector in all their multiple configurations we work on....where there's a will theres apparently a way to find a thigh to butt connection. And to this end I return each week to continue the search for less sogginess. Most of the time however, the connections are found when I kick back a bit (excuse the hip extensor pun) when I laugh at myself and yes fall off the Wunda chair attempting an exercise I've not done before, because often when I don't have time to over analyze my body's 'failings' it seems to know exactly what to do, so perhaps, just maybe my body's not so bad at knowing what to do after all!

It seems the key to a pert bottom is not to be obsessed with it!

Thanks for reading, Have a great week all!

Suzy x

www.seraphinapilates.com

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