A little NYC humour…

Go on be honest, we’ve all done it  

 

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Loving NYC….with Deborah Lessen

  

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Just one step in front of the other....

We buried a friend last Saturday, we said goodbye to a kind, loving man I wish I had known longer. Once again the sands of time so frequently governed by Cancer had run their time too soon. As is so often the case at funerals you learn so much more about the person you knew. This man was a teacher, not a Pilates teacher but a school teacher who has left so many footprints in Children's lives that its not even possible to perceive of this mans presence not changing lives for generations to come.

When we choose to teach as a profession, regardless of the subject. We leave footprints. Not only the lives of our clients, but of our loved ones, our children, our friends and our colleagues. Everything we advocate sends a ripple, a resonance which relies on trust to propel it forward onto greater things. Passion, knowledge and experience are only worth having if you have the humility to share them respectfully, graciously and with integrity. It is a choice where we as professionals sit in a profession that is increasingly being sold out to profit, ego and point scoring. I have never said I was anything more (or less than) a Pilates teacher, just like my rescue hounds I am an indeterminable mixture of schooling and Pedigree. But I do love what I do, I love many of the people I am fortunate to work and train along side and I do believe the heart of this work should be protected fiercely. I have seen many judged on their passion, mistakenly accused of arrogance, imperialistic attitudes and Bullying. Since when did having an opinion make someone a Bully?, that easy over political correctness just  makes light of what can be a very significant problem within the Teaching profession. Teaching is tough because learning can be tough, if we are not learning we are not truly teaching from the heart but from what someone else tells us is so, without question. When we are lucky enough to find the right teachers in our lives, its our job to treasure them, question them, challenge them and to respect them unequivocally, even when their opinion differs from ours. Just as we take care of our clients, professionally, carefully and with integrity these qualities should surely be Industry standard.

So whether you are fortunate to be learning from a friend living with cancer, his extraordinary wife and children. Whether you are blessed enough to have friends, clients or colleagues that share their Pilates and life lessons honestly and openly. Whether you are blessed enough to have the most amazing Mentors and teachers steering you through storms, both professional and personal. Focus your energy of being THAT kind of teacher. We owe it to ourselves, imprint your footprints through life with passion, with knowledge, with humility, with learning with laughter and be kind to yourself. In the words of my friend just 'be the blessing you want to be in others lives'.

To absent friends.

May your journey be guided by love.

Suzy

www.seraphinapilates.com

The road less traveled.....

The road less traveled....

A friend recently asked me why I hadn't written in a while, I paused.

 Apart from the sudden realization that what I write is actually read by people I found myself reflecting on why almost six months had elapsed since I had last put pen to paper. The truth is the last few months have been a long road which I found myself wandering whether or not I was at the beginning or the end of. I was also fearful of being judged by my friends, my family and my peers.

Pilates is my passion but after my divorce, relocating back to my flat, Losing a third of my income overnight thanks to the closure of a Studio I ran classes from (property development clearly more important than community health and well being), starting at www.pilatesnation.co.uk as a studio Instructor and finally appreciating the Method I loved, whilst being overwhelmed all at once. I was also breaking in a new rescue pup to the family and navigating a Breast Cancer scare (all thankfully clear). Did I mention I'm also trying to buy a house in the country at a time when no one has conversations anymore (come back Mr Bank Manager, all is forgiven).

A website still not live which has meant no promotion for my Retreats.

An income cut has meant ceasing 1-1 sessions with my teachers and cutting back on classes I can take, including training. This fact in itself has left me feeling inadequate and lacking, I hear teachers saying time and time again how you must find the money, endure the sacrifices and do what is needed. Not nearly as easy in reality as the opinion is so readily given.

Some storms are just too important not to experience...

 The truth is I have needed the time to rebuild my life, learn from my mistakes, teach what I know and forgive myself for not being Superwoman or knowing more, at least temporarily. Don't get me wrong I'm in awe of the Teachers that can work, train, run families, relationships, friendships, blog, tweet, Instagram and still find time to remember to order the dog food but for now I'm lacking. Lacking in money, sleep, hours in the day and confidence. For 20 years I've  had an unyielding work ethic in whatever I've done, Its cost me friendships, family time and a marriage, I used working as a way to avoid other areas in my life that I lacked experience, patience or skill in. If I was below average in everything else emotionally  I could at least aspire to be the hardest working, most dedicated and most reliable student or employee.

Six months ago that changed

I stopped, 

Sometimes we are given a second chance, sometimes the universe gives us one last chance to take a different road and I took it. Suffice to say I am blessed with Love in my life and blessed to have someone holding my hand as we find our often bare feet on new terrain. Its not just us now, there are children, parents, hounds and cats. There's a new home, beautifully old, romantic and in all likelihood held up with optimism, ivy and moss alone. But sometimes life presents the opportunity and all you can do is hold tight, trust what's important and have faith in what you feel in your deepest soul.

So really when you way up whats been lacking against what I'm going to gain, the last six months finds perspective. I've learned who my friends are, who my Pilates family really are, who loves me even when  I cant be Superwoman. So as life starts to settle and I gradually find my way back to my Pilates practice more intensively I will have gratitude for the last six months and all its challenges, and not anger towards myself.  In September I will be back in NYC with the people I love. I will play, explore and see the city through new eyes before heading back to NJ and  to my Pilates Family and I will be surrounded  by inspiration. I will come back a better teacher than I arrived and I will forever be grateful for the opportunity.

The truth is just when I thought life couldn't get busier. It has. My life is messy, unpredictable, painful, loving and breathtaking in equal measure but with a little optimism and a paintbrush I'm hoping the door to a little cottage in the Forest will be the first of many new adventures, after all, the end of the fairy tale really is just the beginning of the story......

Pilates Love,

Suzy

www.seraphinapilates.com

Defying Gravity....

'Something has changed with in.
 Something is not the same.....'

2015 has arrived and I wander how many people are already berating themselves because their resolutions and good intentions were broken before the clock hit 00.01 on January 1st. Mine were easy, I gave up giving things up, now that I can stick to! I spent New Years eve surrounded by my four paw family under a blanket watching the 100 best Musicals (as voted by a highly dubious public apparently), Not even a glass of bubbles but lots of show tunes, jazz hands and OMG West Side Story should have scored higher!. Ok so not all that Rock and Roll but New Year can be a reflective time for some with the promise of the New year ahead being both exciting, scary but with the promise of unlimited potential. That said Grease should not have been number 1!

So as I've prepared to return to work I hit the Yoga Studio this week. For those of you rolling your eyes I am fully aware Yoga is not Pilates. I'm also aware I know very little about it, I am very challenged by it, I don't know the names of the exercises and my body wont do most of whats asked, and that I'm aching in places I haven't ached this much for in a long time. I've been pushed, pulled, encouraged and delighted to move again without over analysing myself, a whole different dance to discover and I've loved most of it (I'm not great with vocalising and feeling like I'm in a scene from The Walking Dead) I have no desire to incorporate what I've experienced into my Pilates work, except perhaps some of the lessons I've learnt about myself. One particular Italian Teacher reminded me very much of Joseph Pilates himself as I would have imagined him to be, dynamic, passionate, strict and a Maestro of Movement in very short shorts, when he asked us to think of our spines defying gravity I finally breathed, I'm not sure he realised he was tapping into my Musical theatre roots (Wicked anyone?!) or my Pilates spirit but I loved the description and the idea. From here on in my spine and my life will be defying gravity, as the extraordinarily talented  +IdinaMenzel  put it 'I'm through accepting limits, cause someone says they're so'

Which brings me to the heart of this piece, its a New Year thank you to an exceptional man married to an exceptional Pilates teacher. They've been together over 30 years and have a beautiful family. Just one fly in the sticky ointment, he is living with Cancer. I say living because this amazing man has taught me a great deal in the brief time I've been part of his life. It was a privilege to be part of their last minute wedding vow renewals last May when his body threw a curve ball unexpectedly. It was lovely to see him at my friends 50th party last month, as ever the life and soul and we heard his heartfelt message to us loud and clear.
We all have a sell by date, life sometimes forces some of us to become more aware of dates than others so just in case my time is called before this amazing man and his ability to defy gravity, I thought he should know that he has changed my life, changed the life of those I love the most and I owe him a debt of enormous gratitude. I wander at his love of life, his talent, his ability to write, to speak, to paint and the devoted love he has for his wife and their children. He also knows a soul mate when he see's it. He is afterall an expert in the subject.

So to all of those who are living, fighting and loving into the year ahead with curveballs. Change the rules, make up the lyrics, write a new script, go ice skating and drink hot chocolate even though you promised to give up caffeine, sugar, milk, calories,  fun?! for 2015....we all have the ability to defy gravity so just find your wings and spread them wide....

Love, light and passion for 2015,
Suzy x
www.seraphinapilates.com

Tree Houses and fairy lights....

So I've been a little quiet with my writing, some things need to be said to people directly and not be put to paper. I've had some amazing conversations since I last wrote, life changing ones, honest ones, difficult ones. I've experienced anxiety attacks for the first time in a long time and been lucky enough to have the perfect friend to bring me back from the precipice, I've had conversations that have triggered my self esteem issues, I've struggled with nagging historical  food issues and memories of self harming, and for the first time I've chosen not to go into the darkness. Of course we make these decisions alone, we are all responsible for ourselves but a voice in the dark can remind us who we truly are not what we believe ourselves to be.

So as my ability to communicate this week has been uncharacteristically quiet as a result of Laryngitis. Needless to say I've continued to teach where possible (oh the joys of being self employed), non verbal teaching skills pushed to the most hilarious limits and significantly more demonstrating on my part. It seems my classes have delighted in pushing my body when I've had no voice to protest with! Although to be fair being told I was now silently and subtly sadistic did make me smile today. Continuing whilst having to find new ways to communicate has been challenging but enlightening . Whats been amazing is the energy in class, as much I've been honest with my current limitations the classes have really raised their game in response. Instead of worrying about being off my game I've just accepted I am, classes have been focussed, funny and intense as a result. Sometimes we just have to be ourselves and not frightened to let the performance go, at least I do.

And so as I'm surrounded by fairy lights and a huge perfect Christmas tree, I'm reminded that this time of year is about finding the light when its easy to get lost in the cold, dark, days. Its easy to get caught up with the commercial merry go round that Christmas and then New Year can be, but it is ultimately our choice whether we participate or not. We can of course buy into the excess of everything or we can continue living our lives being as honest with ourselves as we can be. January will no doubt see the inevitable mass of people thinking their lives will change dramatically with a new gym membership or a green drink with unpronounceable ingredients. Perhaps it will, but perhaps, we as teachers, partners, parents, children need to appreciate the true changes we need to make are made every day, starting today. When we are kinder to ourselves, to each other, when we find the magic in the conversations we have with our friends, family or clients that aren't via email, text or pigeon carrier I think we can truly appreciate the presence we each others lives.

So as I immerse myself happily in Christmas music, Sparkle and Love and enjoy the joys of voluntary work over the Holidays I will be truly grateful for the season of good will and the start of 2015 and all that it promises. As someone reminded me luck has nothing to do with it, we, ourselves have everything to do with it. And besides what could be more perfect than knowing I'm going to have a tree house with fairy lights to look forward to, some people need loft conversions, extensions and bigger cars. I am blessed with a job I love, family, friends I adore and more four legs than one life can manage so really what else can a London Pilates teacher ask for....well apart from those Chanel earrings of course (yes I am blatantly that shallow).......well a fairy can dream cant she?!, Happy Holidays All!

Suzy, Doodle, Baxter and all the other paws.....

xxx

Sleeping Lions hiding in the Loft....

“Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.” 
― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

Words fascinate me, grammar and spelling less so but words and the power they contain should be given more thought, attention and respect. Its not just language but actual words, spoken or written they can change everything about everything.

It is said only 20% of how we communicate information is through our words, the rest is written in our facial expressions, our tone of voice, the speed and intonation we use, our body language and so many other things that are barely tangible to the average individual. As teachers we rely on words and language to communicate instructions, ideas and theories in an effort to ultimately create movement. Many teachers use too many words, many too few, many are careless and some even swear (guilty as charged) but how many of us consider the resonance of our words with not only our clients but each other?

Whilst attending a Yoga class last week (stop frowning some of you reading this!), the teacher said something that really struck me, 'Our bodies are designed, and able to fall.....more importantly they are also designed to get up'. It was such a simple statement but how often do we get caught up with the word falling and hear and interpret the word as failing?
Lets be clear, I know nothing about Yoga but I like participating it because I know nothing, I like to move without the chatter in my head getting in the way, I like to go too far and loose my balance, I've realized I actually like to fall sometimes. For me those moments shine the light on the experiences where I find balance and feel my feet. I listened as the next teacher talked more than she moved. A class designed to restore and heal (Seriously did I need my heart and chest opened right now?!) The words used in this class were quiet, calming and affirming and it occurred to me that I was surrounded by 19 adults that really just needed to be somewhere peaceful (including me), they needed to be given permission to slow down and rest their minds as well as their bodies. They needed to be sleeping lions.

After my second week working at www.pilatesnation.co.uk I've been reflecting back on working in a studio and the intense joy it brings me. As each new client and class participant has been introduced to me the language of Pilates has taken flight in my spirit, partly because of the teachers around me (finally I'm not alone on the job all the time) but finally getting to use the Method in all its Technicolor glory. I'm sure I'm making lots of mistakes, giggling too much and getting my words all wrong but I'm seeing change in the clients before me which is beyond inspiring. Who would have thought being pushed off a cliff would result in ever expanding wing expansion, although I will happily and with respectful love name every graze, bruise and personal meltdown Kathi since the formidable and fabulous +KathiRossNash was the one who pushed me off the cliff and into this warm albeit turbulent current of air. Of course there will be days when I cry in the supermarket because self doubt, fear and anxiety will be the loudest words in my head telling me I'm not good enough, there will be days that even my favorite grey vest to teach in wont offer me the reassurance it usually does . So if you are reading this having only experienced the wonders of the Mat, find a way to experience the Method in its entirety, it might be a challenge but the rewards will be beyond anything you might expect. I followed a path for 12 years believing I was challenging myself, I worked hard and kept going forward, I never allowed myself the time to fall for fear others would think I was failing. I disguised every bruise, every hurt and every scratch, however deep the wound went. This last year has been a series of falls and flights. The journey started with +BrookeSiler +PeterFiasca and +KathiRossNash in Valencia 2013 and ended up with a fairy called Tinkerbelle in 2014 (its a long story which requires Champagne and luxury nuts before I will share it)....in the meantime I will continue to follow the wisdom of a Bear that liked honey a little too much and get there eventually, oh and then head off to catch a flight to Cyprus to teach Pilates in the sunshine....

Pilates passion and love,

Suzy
www.seraphinapilates.com